Revolutionized Heart October 12, 2009

I am a new person.

In 8th grade, I dedicated my life to Jesus Christ by accepting Him as my Savior. My life did a complete 180. I was two-faced, unsure of my own identity, and the one thing I was sure of was that I was able to pull off two fronts: a rebel on the weekdays and a “Christian” on Sundays.

But it was that moment at a missions trip on a Navajo reservation in Arizona when my life reached its turning point. I found my identity in Christ. It was amazing. And ever since, I’ve been living and growing comfortably as a daughter of Christ.

Yet, after that point, never was I compelled to change. Yes- there would be times when a sermon, testimony or an encounter would make me rethink and readjust my life- but I never saw the need to change my life.

Until now.

This whole conference has been a condensed representation of my journey as a Christian. I listened to eight sermons over four days- and each sermon touched my life in a chronological manner. After I heard a sermon, I would be filled with God’s grace and simple amazement. But then it would be followed with questions- perhaps it was my subconscious trying to doubt, trying to find a loophole, thinking that this was too good to be true. But what’s amazing is that God answered. I would doubt and question- and in the next sermon, he would satisfy my subconscious. Until by the last sermon, Sunday evening at 6 pm, I was left with no more doubt and no more fear.

It just makes sense now. Whenever I identify myself as a Christian, I am willingly taking up the responsibility to represent God. When Moses became angry and called the Israelites ‘rebels,’ he, as a leader and a representative of God, portrayed God’s character wrongly. He showed his followers that God was an angry God- that God thought that they were rebels, when in reality He had loved them. Thus, Moses was unable to see the Promised Land.

I don’t know why it didn’t click before- but it finally did this week. Why would I not live a life to represent God’s image- his love, his grace, his forgiveness? As God has loved me, so shall I love others, in His name- he blesses me to be a blessing.

It’s no longer I want- but now it is I will. I will live to represent Him. What could even compare to sharing the love of Jesus Christ?

What’s different this time…how am I sure that I am new? It is that I no longer fear the world. My worries over what others might think of me, how they might judge me- has become irrelevant. Because the thing is- this isn’t about me. My life isn’t about me- It’s about Christ. I become full and fulfilled when I live for Him, and not for myself. I no longer stress about my future or whether I am capable. Because it is when I am weak, that I am strong. When things are seemingly impossible considering my “lack of,” –or my weakness, it is then when God receives all the glory when He makes impossible things possible in my life.

So I am free by God’s grace. I choose to live a life of the image of Christ. My heart has changed. How it sees people, school, the future, my relationships, my past- it’s become revolutionized for Christ- and I would want it no other way.

Praise God. Our savior, our healer, our Father, our Lord.

Surrounded September 28, 2009

Psalm 23: 

Imagine person X- he doesn’t have direction in his life, he’s lost, confused, doesn’t know what to do or where to go. He’s hopeless.

He then finds Jesus- and this is what happens:

“He guides me in paths of righteousness” Psalm 23:3

So now his life looks like this-  

J             X

Jesus is in front of X, directing him, guiding him, to righteousness; X, who once wandered confused and without direction or purpose, now has Jesus leading him. awesome. 

But then it goes on: “I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” Psalm 23:4

Now, Jesus is not only directing X, but His Rod and Staff- representing His word- is comforting X. Looking like this:

             R

J           X

             S

The X we knew- purposeless, confused, hopeless- not only has direction now, but is comforted whenever he needs help. He can depend on the Lord’s Rod and Staff- The Word -for comfort anytime. amazing.

But it doesn’t end there:

“Surely goodness and love will follow me.” Psalm 23:6

Looking like this:

             R

J           X            G

             S

God’s goodness and love- his Grace- is behind X. Whenever X falls or makes a mistake, God’s grace catches him and brings him right back up.

So now, X, who was once lost, hopeless and without direction, is now surrounded by God- by His direction, His comfort and His grace.

Astounding.

-Hillsong Church London-

Imagining a world that cares September 21, 2009

This summer, I spent three months in a place that I looked down on because of its materialism, superficiality and self-absorption- my own native country: Korea. I’ve already been to Korea fourteen times, however by the second week, without fail, my animosity and distance towards my own culture would grow uncontrollably-to the extent where I would start counting down the minutes for my ‘vacation’ to come to a glorious end.  

Honestly, I’m not quite sure what I was thinking or what got to me that day when I decided to spend so much time in a country that had such a bad reputation in my memories. But now, 93 days later, I look back and I can say with upmost confidence that my peculiar determination that day was only through God’s grace and will.  He exposed me to things that I never would have imagined, let me feel emotions that I thought were impossible and gave me an appreciation for the family and culture that I for so long took for granted.

I saw and heard forms of injustices that I never knew before existed. Sex tourism in Korea is a growing industry, yet because of the cleverness of the managers of this industry-aka the ‘pimps’- who guise sex trafficking of women as prostitution, the victims are seen as offenders. How? Women are lured into prostitution and forced to receive pre-payments, which the finance companies who have partnered with the sex tourism industry deceive as debt. Now they have the upper hand. Regardless of the fact that prostitution is illegal in Korea, they are now able to justify their entitlement to the women through the victim’s ‘debt.’ In this way, even in the eyes of the police officer, the pimp becomes the victim- after all he’s the one who ‘lost’ his money- while the actual victim, the trafficked women, is seen as the offender. Clever.

Learning about the underground signs and words that imply prostitution and sex trafficking, my eyes opened to a whole new country. Korea, as I see it now, is not all about shopping and materialism, but it’s a country that’s hurting inside. A complex nation in which its rapid economic development has earned itself the title of a second world nation, but didn’t allow enough time for its core mentality to make the transition as well. So although it’s seen by the world as a second world nation, a third world mentality still looms at its core. As a result, we’re left with a complicated mess when it comes to the issue of sex trafficking. Korea not only sends women off to more developed countries, but now is able to receive them from under developed countries- all the while human trafficking is taking place inside the country as well.

Although in 2004, Korea passed a law illegalizing prostitution- placing prostitution on the same level as sex-trafficking, due to the frequent pretense of prostitution for the sex tourism industry, the streets are still filled with blatant prostitution rings. The worst part? The bribed or perhaps oblivious police officers who won’t do anything about it. I’ve witnessed police officers turning a blind eye towards obvious cases of sex trafficking, refusing to let go of their narrow mentality that prostitution is the women’s fault- even if women are turned into sex slaves through this industry that is apparently ‘her own fault.’

When I learned about this inside the office, this issue seemed so pertinent, so time-desperate- as if everyone had to stop what they’re doing and realize that a new form of slavery was growing right before our eyes. But it’s incredible, the moment I’m outside those walls, the world still goes on. People are so busy. Busy to do something, to make something out of their lives. So we run. We’re constantly running, sometimes not even knowing where we’re going. The sad part is, that while we’re running, we neglect to see who around us is hurting, who around us is dying. What is it about us that persuades us that whatever we’re running for is more important then the lives of our fellow human beings?

Pastor Gary, from Hillsong Church London posed this question: “What would happen if the world started to care?” Imagine what the future would hold. Imagine how many lives would be saved from hurt, pain and death. Imagine. The concept is so simple- to care- and the results would be so enormous. So why not start? Let’s start caring, yeah?